


excuse me (your heart is in my heart)

by daesunki



Series: sledgefu week 2019 [1]
Category: The Pacific (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Canon-Typical Violence, Codependency, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Major Character Injury, Possessive Behavior, Soul Bond, snaf with something to protect is a feral fucking animal, theyre gone for each other and burgie is Tired
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-06
Updated: 2019-05-06
Packaged: 2020-02-27 03:59:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,076
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18731191
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/daesunki/pseuds/daesunki
Summary: Having a soulmate on the battlefield was a nightmare. It was like having your heart run outside of your body with bullets and bombs chasing after it, with nothing to protect it but a shitty uniform and a rifle to fight back with. It wasexhausting, and maddening, but seeing Eugene in their foxhole at the end of the day with a tired smile on his face and their hands touching, nourishing them through their link, was like a reward for every single heart attack Merriell had that day.





	excuse me (your heart is in my heart)

**Author's Note:**

> (title taken from save your goodbye by mike posner)
> 
> this is a scene from a bigger soulmate au that im planning and hope to write out one day. this prompt was a good excuse to write at least this part out lmao
> 
> happy sledgefu week gays!

Peleliu is so much fucking worse than Guadalcanal. The heat, the oppressive humidity, the seemingly never ending sheets of rain, all of that Merriell could handle. He's a Louisiana boy, grew up on the bayou, the only real difference between Guadalcanal and New Orleans was being shot at day and night. No, real hell was Peleliu, with its scalding hot sun and dry air and petrified sharp corals that cut into his palms and knees. It didn't fucking help that they had almost no water for the first few days, and that the Japs were pushing back harder than ever. Merriell thought it was stupid and naive when boots asked why the Japs don't just give up and surrender, but he was starting to wonder that as well.

What truly made Peleliu much, much worse, though, was that he had Eugene now. Eugene, innocent, green boot Eugene, who saved his life on that fucking airfield even though Snafu had been nothing but mean to him. Merriell didn't really believe in anything, but whatever was up there, he just _knew_ they were laughing their divine ass off at him.

Having a soulmate on the battlefield was a nightmare. It was like having your heart run outside of your body with bullets and bombs chasing after it, with nothing to protect it but a shitty uniform and a rifle to fight back with. It was _exhausting_ , and maddening, but seeing Eugene in their foxhole at the end of the day with a tired smile on his face and their hands touching, nourishing them through their link, was like a reward for every single heart attack Merriell had that day.

They were new. Their bond revealed itself on the airfield, when Eugene, face pale but determined, pulled the dizzy Merriel back to his feet; when their hands touched, just for a second, they knew. The warm, buzzing feeling where their skin connected was unmistakable, and Merriell wanted to scream and curse until the Japs got him. It was perfect. Here, now, where death was almost as sure as breathing, he found his soulmate in a lanky, redheaded boot who still believed in the kindness of men. Eugene, for his part, seemed almost delighted. That night, on the second level of the abandoned building, he held his hand out for Merriell to take, smiling at him hopefully, breathless with anticipation.

And Merriell, damn him, took it.

They held hands whenever they could- in line for chow, in their foxhole, on the long walks between shootouts. With their bond being so new, they needed as much physical contact as possible to prevent bond-sickness. Even a short separation left Merriell dizzy and Eugene nauseous, so they tried to avoid it as much as they could- and they did, at the beginning. But climbing the sharp hills of Peleliu was hard, and required two hands, and the corridors between corals were narrow enough that only one man could cross at a time. Merriell climbed in front of Eugene, and took comfort in the quiet compass in the center of his chest that told him that Eugene was behind him, safe and sound.

They were climbing another one of those fucking ridges when a gunshot echoed between the coral walls, and the world grinded to a halt, then sped up, in that order. There's a split second of silence before the Marines around him erupt into screams and shouts, some ducking behind random rocks, some throwing themselves to the ground. Someone shouts about a sniper. Merriell freezes, a dull ache starting up in his left arm and flaring up into a full blown _burn_ within a second. He pats himself down, confusion taking over him when his hands come away clean; and then-

"Oh," he hears behind him, Eugene's voice horrendously weak. _God, please, fuck, no_ , rings desperately through Merriell's head as he turns around, cold horror building in his chest at the sight of Eugene, eyes wide in his pale face, blood seeping between his fingers where they're clutched around his bicep. He pulls his hand away, realization dawning on his face when he sees the crimson on it. "Oh," he repeats, weaker.

Then his knees buckle, sending him to the ground.

Merriell acts on pure reflex, shooting out to catch him in his arms as the horror turns into panic. His mind is strangely blank as he leans Eugene back against the nearest rock, trying to cradle his dear face in his hands and roll his sleeve up at the same time. He gives up when it takes too much time, choosing to press his forehead against Eugene's sweaty one after removing his helmet. Very distantly, he realizes he's saying Eugene's name, a panicked chain of _Eugene, Gene, Gene_ leaving his mouth without him even thinking about it. The pain in his bicep must be nothing compared to what Eugene must be feeling, and the thought makes his stomach curl.

"Merriell," Eugene says, voice thin. "It's okay."

A hysterical laugh comes out of him, ugly and humorless. "It better fuckin' be. I'm not losin' you."

Eugene smiles, a small, weak thing. His eyes are unfocused, lips blue. "You won't," he promises, raising a shaky hand to squeeze the one Merriell has on his cheek. Merriell presses his forehead against his until it almost hurts and concentrates on the feeling of Eugene's breath on his face, willing it to anchor him. His heart is out of his body, and he let it get hurt.

"Snaf," someone says behind him, and it's Burgie, that's Burgie's voice, "step back, let the corpman take care of him."

 _What_? The notion is so ridiculous that it takes a second to register in his brain. _Step back_? How the fuck could Burgie ask that of him? He needs to be with Eugene, needs to be there for him, to protect him; he already failed to do that once, he's not going to slip up again. Something in him wants to swallow Eugene whole, to absorb him into himself so that nothing can hurt him again, so that nothing will ever come between them. He squeezes his eyes shut, focusing on the buzzing where his hands are touching Eugene.

" _Snafu_." Burgie says again, voice commanding, and Merriell whips around with his teeth bared and a growl rising from his throat, eyes trained on Burgie, who takes a half step back, alarm on his face. Merriell is vaguely aware of how wild he's acting, like a wounded animal protecting itself, but he can't bring himself to care.

"I'm stayin' right here," he says, voice low and dangerous. "And if you tell me to step back one more fuckin' time, Burgie, I swear-"

"Merriell," Eugene says. He sounds stronger, the shock probably fading away. When Merriell looks at him, he nods. "Don't be an ass. I need medical attention. You can sit next to me."

The corpman steps out from behind Burgie, a thin man with a heavily freckled face, and settles on Eugene's injured side with his first aid kit. He manages to quickly snip away Eugene's sleeve with a pair of scissors while Merriell settles on Eugene's other side, holding his hand, and observes the wound with a trained eye. "Well, you're lucky," he says, glancing up at Eugene with a short smile. "The bullet only grazed you."

Merriell wants to scoff. "Doesn't feel like it," Eugene says, echoing his thoughts while the corpman starts to clean the area with a cloth. 

That earns them a laugh. "Yeah, I know, right? Guess you still got something to look forward to," he jokes. "I'll stitch you up and you'll be good to go."

Unbelievable. Merriell can’t help but feel ashamed of his reaction, now that he knows how bad Eugene’s injury actually is; he blew everything way out of proportion. He doesn’t remember reacting to anything like that in his life, and the thought makes him uneasy. Is this what his life’s going to be like from now on? His emotions close to the surface and ready to burst at the earliest convenience? He was never a stable or reserved person by any means, but this was excessive, even for him. Sighing heavily, Merriell scrubs a hand down his face, feeling it pulling at his skin as the adrenaline and panic melt away. He thought he knew what fear was before, but it was _nothing_ compared to what he just experienced. That deep-seated, blood-freezing terror that took hold of his heart and made it impossible to breathe, that feeling like the world was going to end- is this what’s in store for him?

He’s so caught up in his thoughts that he barely feels Eugene’s hand squeeze his, but his voice calling him snaps him out of it. The redhead is looking at him searchingly, eyes kind on his face, and Merriell can’t help but think that if this is what he’s protecting this fiercely, it must be worth it.

“Can’t take my eyes off you for a single second or you’ll get yourself shot, huh, Sledgehammer?” he jokes, voice soft and hushed so the corpman diligently stitching up Eugene’s wound won’t hear him. He has a tough reputation to maintain, after all.

Eugene rolls his eyes at that, and Merriell feels a seemingly random rush of affection for him that takes him completely by surprise and leaves him feeling hot in the face. “Grazed,” he corrects him good-naturedly, head rolling so the side of his face is pressed against his shoulder. His eyes never leave Merriel’s face, not even to look at what the corpman is doing to him. Merriell preens under the attention, a smile rising to his lips unbidden. “Guess you’ll just have to watch over me, then,” Eugene adds with a knowing smirk.

Oh, _this boy_. He keeps surprising him. Merriell throws his head back and releases a loud bark of laughter, pleasant surprise coursing through him. He only saw this side of Eugene once, the day after they bonded, and he was just as taken with it then as he is now. He likes it, this teasing and downright flirty side of him; he likes Eugene, period.

“Guess I will,” he replies conspiratorially, and Eugene wiggles his eyebrows before bursting into a fit of poorly restrained laughter. Merriell watches him with a sense of pride swelling in his chest- _he_ did that. _He_ made Eugene laugh. He wants to live with this feeling for the rest of his life.

“Okay, you’re all set,” the corpman announces suddenly, scissors snipping the end of the thread in one decisive motion. “I’ll be back to check on you tonight. Try to take it easy, yeah?”

“Thanks, Weiss,” Eugene calls after his retreating form. In the relative silence that follows, his eyes find Merriell’s face again. He looks better than he did right after he got injured, even though that’s a pretty low bar to jump over. “Sorry I scared you,” he says quietly, between them.

Merriell scrunches his nose with a smile, getting up and offering his hand to Eugene. “Not your fault, Gene,” he grunts as he helps the redhead to his feet, the two of them now on the same eye level. “I’m just glad you’re okay.”

“Yeah, me too,” Eugene agrees. Then, after what look like a moment of hesitation, he leans in and kisses Merriell’s cheek, quick and sweet, before turning around and leaving to get his pack and helmet from where they fell with him a few minutes ago. Merriell stands, thunderstruck, hand coming up to touch the place Eugene’s lips brushed, his heart beating impossibly fast in his chest. It feels like all the blood in his body is rushing straight to his face, the heat making him sweat almost as effectively as the Peleliu sun. The buzzing feeling that he usually only experiences when he’s actively touching Eugene lingers, spreading from his face to his entire body, until the tips of his fingers and toes are tingling.

A stupid smile splits his face in half. Is this what his life is going to look like?

“Are you just gonna stand there all day?” Eugene calls back to him from where he’s moved up the ridge in front of them, following the slightly exasperated-looking but still smiling Burgie. Body buzzing, Merriell picks up his pack, puts on his helmet, and sets out to follow his soulmate.

For once, his future looks good.

**Author's Note:**

> (if were being totally honest im shakin in my boots posting this bc this is my first work in this fandom and i feel like such an outsider fkdghlkfghf rip in pieces)


End file.
